Dear USA: When You Were Awesome

A letter to America from the boy in western Sydney who was once your biggest fan

You might be cool, but you’ll never be purple safari suit cool.

I was 5 years old at Saint Mary’s South Primary School when I first fell in love with you.

Her name was Miss Hess. Blonde hair. An accent I’d never heard before in my whole short life. I remember her standing at the front of our kindergarten classroom and being absolutely mesmerised. I asked …